Movie: Lovely Angels of the Wind

by Casca

Just to add insult to injury, here's my contribution to the thread. Rather than live action, it is Anime, which cuts down the SFX budget drastically. Purists will be pleased to note that the dialogue is in Japanese, subtitled into English.

Narrator: They aren't your typical angels....

<Scene: Council Spires of Heaven.>

Dominic: "...charged with violation of the Pax Dei, assault upon a member of the Seraphim Council, destruction of a Divine tether, and disruption of the filing system of the Archives. Archangel Beth has even revoked your Library privileges! How do you plead?"

</Scene>

Narrator:...in fact, they're downright dirty.

<Scene: two Malakim of the Wind, on trial. One is a fiery redhead, the other a demure, raven- tressed brunette.>

Yuriel: *bowing* "We're sorry!"

Keiel: "But it wasn't our fault!!!"

</Scene>

Narrator: Now they're being punished for doing their job too well.

<Scene>

Yuriel & Keiel, looking shocked: "We have to arrest WHO??"

</Scene>

Narrator: To make amends, they have to go to Hell....

<Scene: Hell, the streets of Shal-Mari. Yuriel and Keiel, thinly disguised as Habbalah, their black wings under cloaks.>

Yuriel: "I don't think this was such a good idea..."

Keiel: "Oh, shut up. We just have to find Valefor and bring him back for questioning. How hard could it be?"

</Scene>

<Scene>

Keiel, grabbing some Impudite off the street: "Hey, we're looking for Prince Valefor. Seen him around?"

</Scene>

Narrator: ...because Heaven can't afford any more property damage.

<Scene: a huge explosion, taking a large chunk of Shal-Mari with it.>

Yuriel, running madly: "So much for the direct approach!"

Keiel, also running. "Hey, how was -I- supposed to know that twerp was Kobal?"

</Scene>

Narrator: Their mission: find the Demon Prince of Thieves....

<Scene>

Valefor, dressed in an Armani suit, flanked by obviously Yakuza bodyguards. "They're on to me. Take them out."

</Scene>

Narrator: ...and haul him in for questioning.

<Scene>

Yuriel & Keiel crashing through an expensive plate-glass window, Numinous Corpus: Wings evident. They land in front of a surprised-looking Valefor consorting with nubile geisha.

Valefor, reaching for a tray and offering it to the angels: "Bonbon?"

Yuriel, pulling out a warrant. "Prince Valefor? You're under arrest. Please come with us."

Keiel, hefting a nasty-looking sword, the size of which suggests it was taking from Final Fantasy VII: "We're here to kick your butt back to Heaven. Dommie has some questions for you. Got a problem with that?"

Jump cut to outside view of office building. A huge explosion vaporizes the top floor.

</Scene>

Narrator: Heaven help them...

<Scene: Keiel stealing a motorcycle outside a biker bar.>

Yuriel: "We really shouldn't be doing this..."

Keiel: "We're angels of the Wind! That's all the justification -I- need."

</Scene>

Narrator: ..because no one else will.

<Scene: Yuriel and Keiel pinned down by a small horde of Djinn and Calabim.>

Keiel: "We're screwed."

Yuriel: "Not necessarily. I have...this!" (Reaches into blouse, pulls out something the size and shape of a Tarot card. She throws it at the demons, and it seems to take on a life of its own, swooping and attacking with razor-sharp edges.)

Keiel, impressed. "Jean'll freak when he finds out you stole that."

Yuriel, grinning. "Who said I stole it from -Jean-?"

Keiel, a horrified look on her face. "You didn't!"

Yuriel: "Remember that little detour we took through Tartarus?"

</Scene>

Narrator: They're on a mission from God...

<Scene>

Keiel, in full biker-babe regalia, outrunning the small army of police following her.

</Scene>

Narrator: ...and they're going to raise a little Hell in the process.

<Scene>

Keiel, waxing philosophical: "I look at it this way. We can't fall, so that means we're allowed to wreak as much havoc as we need to get the job done."

</Scene>

IN NOMINE: LOVELY ANGELS OF THE WIND

<Voice over>

"Maladjusted, Malakim. What's the difference?"

 

-- Casca, Seraph of Archives and Dirty Pair junkie
(bertishg@db.erau.edu)

**Flaming Feather**

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