Hello. You've talked to the rest now you want to know about Impudites? We are the coolest, the best. I suppose your Lilim would have told you that she was the best, but that's the kind of talk you always get from the Sisters. They think that because they are rare they are special. Rare can be special, but it isn't always the case. Now don't get me wrong, I've met some terrific Lilim in my time, but also some scum. The Princes know. Lilim cost a lot and can be used for a lot of things, but if a Prince wants someone loyal, charming and depandable, nine times out of ten they'll call for an Impudite. You see, Lilim have this innate 'Freedom' thing they've inherited from Lilith. This makes even the most loyal likely to turn if they think they can get a better deal. Not us.
We Impudites are like Mercurians without restrictions. We are the most like humans out of all the Bands, and they are the coolest. Definitely one thing God got right. Mercurians try to imitate humans, to be liek them, but they deny themselves the pleasure of the greatest gift humans have. Violence. How can you be human if you can't release that little ball of rage inside you occassionally? Mercurians claim to be "Friends of Man" but humans like us better. I could prove it if I had a Mercurian here but you'll have to take my word on it. Say a Mercurian and an Impudite walk into a room. Instantly the Mercurian can know who's related to who, what they're doing, so on and so forth. Who cares? The Impudite will be chatting to the group in the corner, making friends, getting to know all about them from them. Understand? A Mercurian can walk up and tell them all he knows, but it just freaks them out. They'd prefer us, we've taken the time to get to know them. We are charming to them, while the others, despite their claimed closeness to humanity, are just plain alien to your average human. And if the human needs to be slapped down, we'll do it while the Mercurian will cringe and call in the Malakim. Now, which human's going to respect someone who can't even do their own dirty-work? But we wouldn't kill the human. That would be a waste of Essence. They were bred for us. Easy Essence batteries which we can drain when we need it. They thank us for it. Now it's not even theft, if you think about it. They didn't earn it, they don't need it and the untrained can't even use it effectively. Better that we take what we need and use it for a purpose. They wouldn't allow a child to keep a million dollars for no purpose, they'd take it and use it. We do the same.
Anyway, it's been great talking to you. I hope your article goes well but I have to run. I've got a date tonight with a hot young thing and I'm sure after a while she'll give me everything I want, and I do mean *everything*. Take it easy and enjoy yourself. I look forward to reading your interviews. Goodbye.
By Leath Sheales.
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