Finishing Off Santa

By James Walker


As everyone knows, the Tsayadim have been roaming the Marches, seeking to finish the Purity Crusade, for centuries. And they have a bad reputation. One reason for this is the "True" Tsayadim: A group (well several groups, actually) of Habbalah who, deeming themselves angels, "realise" that the reason that they don't have an Archangel to serve is because Uriel has yet to return, and so seek to finish the Purity Crusade, so as to prove worthy of serving him when he returns. Beleth sponsors one of these groups, and exterminates any group which seeks to attack the ethereals under her protection. This is rarely necessary, as the True Tsayadim believe that the goal is to stop humans liking ethereals: any ethereal serving Beleth will be feared/hated by humans, and so is not a threat. Those who seek to tempt humans, and inspire love or friendship - the Seelie Court, the Norse pantheon, the Royal Flying Snoopae Corps, and so on - they are the threat, the ones who draw humanity away from serving the One true God. And so they hunt in the Marches.

Or this year, in the corporeal.

Santa Claus is just getting far to strong; he knows when you're naughty or nice; gives rewards for good behaviour; is known throughout the world. And then there are the continual rumours that he is actually Odin. He's set himself up as a rival to God, and he's got to go.

So how?

Well, a handful of Demons of Nightmares work with the Nybbites in marketing, encouraging fears of 'missing out' on the latest craze. They've been inspiring The Media to create the 'Greatest Christmas Of All Time" - throughout the world, people can pay to take their children to the largest auditorium/sports field/theatre/whatever, and each has a Santa Claus, all of whom look identical. A few seconds after a Santa leaves one site, one arrives at the next site, further around the world - people at each site get to see live feeds of Santa at earlier sites, following sunset around the world.

Which means that millions of people will be watching when the True Tsayadim strike team guns him down, wounding the reindeer and massacring the people in the bleaches. Secondary teams will be at the next few sites, kidnapping the Santa, inflicting a mortal wound on one of the reindeer and sending it out to bleed to death in the presence of thousands of children. If the backup teams believe that they'll fail, plans have been made to set fire to the sites, driving people out.

The True Tsayadim have no idea how many children will be catapulted into Beleth's half of the Marches by this, and haven't even tried to guess how many adults will follow, traumatised by the sight of their children in extreme shock. After all, why guess; Nightmares will soon know.

More importantly, Santa will be "dead" - children all over the world know that adults lie to them about unpleasant subjects, so they won't believe their parents when they are told otherwise - and everyone at school will be talking about how Santa was gunned down. The 'meme' of Santa's death will travel from child to child for generations, and hopefully take down Odin as well.

Unless the PC's find out, and stop the True Tsayadim, of course....


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