Agnellus, Kyriotate Vassal of War, Angel of Sock Puppets

By Moe Lane


Corporeal Forces: 5
Strength: 11
Agility: 9
Ethereal Forces: 4
Intelligence: 8
Precision: 8
Celestial Forces: 6
Will: 12
Perception: 12
Word-Forces: 2

Skills: Dodge/1, Fighting/6, Large Weapon (sword/6), Ranged Weapon (rifle/6, shotgun/3, pistol/3), Small Weapon/4 (Knife), Tactics/3

Songs: Blades (Celestial/3), Entropy (Ethereal/3), Form (Celestial/3), Healing (All/1), Ice (Corporeal/3), Light (Celestial/6), Motion (Ethereal/3), Numinous Corpus (Acid/6, Barbs/6, Claws/6, Fangs/6, Plates/6, Tongue/6) (virtuoso), Shattering (Corporeal/3), Shields (All/2), Thunder/3

Attunements: Kyriotate of War, Seraph of War, Ofanite of War, One to One, Proficiency (Fighting), Scabbard, Vassal of War, Angel of Sock Puppets

Relics: Crocodile Sock Puppet/1, Lamb Sock Puppet/1

Angel of Sock Puppets: Identical to the Kyriotate of Jean Attunement, except that it only works on sock puppets. Each sock puppet ties up 2 Forces.

Rites: Make a sock puppet.

Well, actually, Agnellus didn't precisely expect to actually get this particular Word. It was sort of a joke, you see?

No, really. The Kyriotate has always had a peculiar sense of humor - one reason why it switched over from Laurence's service to Michael's. It's not that the Archangel of the Sword is humorless, exactly, but Laurence does have a strong sense of decorum - and Agnellus doesn't. All in all, the Kyriotate was giving an excellent impression of a square peg in a round hole, so everybody concerned decided that War might be a better career choice than the Sword.

In Agnellus' case, everybody concerned was right. The Kyriotate fit right in as one of Michael's heavy hitters, being predisposed towards fairly direct methods of conflict resolution. Its rise through the ranks was steady and straightforward: pretty soon, it was leading assaults, rather than just participating in them - and leading them well.

That's what caused it all: you see, it went like this. Agnellus and his squad had stumbled across an Ethereal Tether aligned with Hell. Literally stumbled across it: one minute everything was nice and peaceful, the next the team was surrounded by honest-to-God hordes of demons and ethereals trying their level best to soul-kill them all. The squad broke free (trashing the Tether in the process), and then spent the next four days in a steadily-increasing nightmare of sudden attacks, desperate defenses, crushing fatigue and the more unpleasant parts of the Marches.

When they finally found themselves in a place of safety, three of the ten Warriors were in Trauma, two were mildly dissonant from a too-liberal interpretation of their dissonance conditions and one was one good blow away from becoming a Remnant. On the other hand, they had managed to knock out two Ethereal Tethers, identify and weaken three Infernal ones and generally send an impressive number of demons to their Hearts. All in all, not bad for the home team ... so when Michael showed up, he was in a sufficiently good mood to promise to sponsor Agnellus for a Word. Did the Kyriotate have any suggestions?

Agnellus swears that its response, "How about Sock Puppets?" was due to equal parts bone crushing fatigue, lingering aftereffects from barreling its way through countless Nightmares and sheer giddy relief at being alive. It was not supposed to be taken as a serious request - and it was certainly not meant to be acted upon.

However, after a certain amount of experimentation Agnellus has found that the situation is actually not bad. Not bad at all. It's all how one looks at it. Sure, Sock Puppets are never going to be what one would call a heavyweight Word - but it has its place in War. Specifically, ambush; even now, demons have great difficulty believing that anyone wearing a sock puppet is going to be dangerous in a fight. Well, most times they'd be right, but then most times they aren't facing a sock puppet that is both knowledgeable in and competent at more than a dozen ways to turn an opponent into pate. For some reason, they seem to keep thinking that the danger is the person wearing the puppet, not the puppet itself: the Kyriotate takes advantage of this whenever possible. An especially fun trick for Agnellus is for it to possess a puppet or puppets, get it/them somehow onto an enemy's hand(s), then start materializing weapons from nowhere to shoot up the bad guys. Aside from the aesthetic issues, it makes avoiding dissonance so much easier...


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