(Original Concept by Matthew Streight)
Corporeal Forces: 5
Strength: 12
Agility: 8
Ethereal Forces: 2
Intelligence: 2
Precision: 6
Celestial Forces: 5
Will: 12
Perception: 8
Word-Forces: 2
Vessel: hulking guy/5
Skills: Dodge/5, Fighting/5, Large Weapon/4 (Club),
Ranged Weapon/4 (rifle)
Songs: Entropy (Corporeal/1, Ethereal/6, Celestial/3),
Motion (Celestial/5), Shields (Corporeal/2,
Ethereal/4, Celestial/2)
Discord: Paranoid/6 (he used to have Angry/2, but he
got that taken care of really quickly after he got his
Word)
Attunements: Calabite of Dark Humor, Prank, Knight of
Derision, Demon of Wedgies
Demon of Wedgies: Nelson can use his resonance to
inflict Mind Hits, provided that he gives his target a
wedgie at the same time.
Rites: Guess.
Nelson used to be the Freak's Freak: that is, big,
violent and dumb as a post. Well, he's still that
way, but now he's also a paranoid big, violent and
dumb Freak. Of course, there's also the question
about whether 'paranoid' is a justifiable descriptor:
after all, paranoia is defined as the irrational fear
that Somebody's Out To Get You...
It all went down like this. Up until quite recently,
Nelson was just another Servitor of Dark Humor,
cheerfully abusing anyone and anything that he could
get away with. Being just bright enough to
plagiarize, he took his inspiration from the
stereotypical playground bully. Even then, the
Calabite liked giving wedgies: when done right, it
served his Word quite nicely. True, being able to
turn some poor bastard's underwear into a hat wasn't
the surest road to promotion, but it had the virtues
of reliability. There's always somebody ready to
laugh at a good wedgie. All in all, Nelson was fairly
set.
That was before the infamous Kronos Incident.
In his more lucid moments, Nelson damns himself for a
fool for going into the Archives in the first place.
He should have just left the stupid Impudite of Fate
be - but, no, he had to go bother the twerp on his own
turf. Said twerp had hid himself well, though: so
well that Nelson never actually did find the bugger.
But the Calabite did come across the Prince of Fate,
though. A Prince of Fate with his back turned to a
Freak of Dark Humor who was almost transcendently
pissed off with everything about his surroundings at
the time. For what it's worth, Nelson tried to
restrain the impulse.
He failed.
Interested scholars have asked him since then to
answer one of the lesser mysteries regarding the
Prince of Fate: boxers or briefs? And what color?
Alas, Nelson cannot answer them: he has apparently
blocked the actual details from his memories -
besides, a belated rush of oxygen to the brain caused
him to keep his eyes closed during the procedure.
This was almost certainly wise of him, considering
that the mere exposure of Kronos' undergarments was
enough to cause the sudden explosion of virtually
every entity's head within 100 yards. Indeed, there
were only three survivors of the Kronos Incident: The
Prince of Fate, Nelson (no doubt within the eye of the
metaphorical storm, as it were) - and Lucifer himself.
Apparently, he had been just passing by. After the
Lightbringer stopped shrieking with laughter, he gave
Nelson the Word of Wedgies on the spot.
Nelson has not enjoyed the experience, much. Kobal
was happy enough to provide him with a Distinction for
his trouble - there's a rumor that the Laughing Prince
has somehow managed to acquire a close up photo of
Kronos' expression at the critical moment - but the
new Knight does not have any commensurate
responsibilities. Furthermore, his former colleagues
avoid him like the veritable plague. Well, actually,
everybody does. Kronos may have been unable to
vaporize the Calabite on the spot, thanks to Lucifer's
obvious favor, but the Prince of Fate is quite aware
just how temporary that favor can be. Once it
dissipates - well, so will Nelson.
At least, that's the smart bet. Experienced
Kronos-watchers are actually quite impressed by how
long the Demon of Wedgies has lasted, in fact.
Despite Nelson's best efforts, he has encountered
Kronos on several occasions, and each time the Prince
has had a slightly puzzled smile on his face as he
calmly looked over the sweating Knight. Obviously,
whatever it is that's coming is going to be epic,
considering how long it's taking to come to full
fruition.
Obviously, this is not sitting well with Nelson. He's
a nervous wreck by now, but wouldn't you be? His
dissonance levels keep fluctuating - the Calabite is
too busy trying to find a place to hide to properly
serve Dark Humor - thus explaining his impressive
level of Paranoia. Somewhere, deep in the foggy
recesses that serve for his mind, the Calabite knows
that this should trigger the interested gazes of the
Game, which just gives him one more thing to try to
ineffectually watch out for.
He needn't bother. The Game is just as keen as anyone
else is to see what Kronos will eventually come up
with as a response...
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