Tofu Zombies

By Moe Lane


Corporeal Forces: 3
Strength: 8
Agility: 4
Ethereal Forces: 2
Intelligence: 4
Precision: 4
Celestial Forces: 0
Will: 0
Perception: 0


Skills: Dodge/6, Emote/4, Fighting/4, Lying/3, Small Weapon/6 (Hatchet)

Songs: Healing (Corporeal/3), Numinous Corpus/3 (tentacles)

Discord: Need/3 (Human Flesh: see below)

To begin with, they are not actually made out of tofu. Well, not completely made out of tofu; if nothing else, the stuff doesn't usually have Ethereal Forces. Indeed, it's a stretch to say that tofu has Corporeal Forces. It's best to think of the tofu as providing the organic matrix within which the Forces are quasi-stabilized - which isn't really what's going on, but that's how Saminga visualizes it, and who are we to argue with a Demon Prince?

In its (and I use the term loosely) 'natural' state a Tofu Zombi resembles a roughly human-sized heap of vaguely white, rubbery goop that feels disturbingly warm to the touch - but don't touch it! If you do, the stuff will immediately envelop you, 'grow' some fangs, pop open your skull and suck down your brain. Then, five minutes later, it'll put on your clothing and start living your life for you.

Yup, this is a shape-shifting Undead. It doesn't really realize that it's Undead, of course - in its goop state, it's not intelligent; when aping human form, it's profoundly self-delusional - so it'll continue to do the things that you'd do and act like you'd act, for as long as it can. True, without a recognizable Will and/or Perception, it'll have some problems, but everybody has off weeks, right?

Well, Tofu Zombis never have anything but off weeks. The above Need is for the actual flesh of whomever the Tofu Zombi is currently impersonating: if it does not ingest at least twenty pounds of said flesh, every day, it will suffer not only the usual Body Hit loss, but also suffer severe anxiety and pain until the Need is fulfilled. Fortunately (or unfortunately), it is usually quite capable of rationalizing away keeping the corpse available for gradual consumption ... and is even able to hide it, as best it can.

Of course, eventually there's nothing left to eat. If a Tofu Zombi goes more than a day without consumption, it begins to revert back; within six hours it will turn back into a glob of goop... unless, of course, somebody else wanders into range at any point during the reversion stage. A Tofu Zombi retains just enough intelligence to try to isolate another human and begin the whole process over again.

Needless to say, the Host hates these things - unfortunately, Tofu Zombis can pass an eyeball check with little difficulty. The fact that they don't actually realize what they are makes things problematic, as well. The best way to detect one is by touch; a Perception roll at -3 will reveal that the skin is still slightly rubbery, and of course the standard 'shoot him in the head and see if he keeps moving' always works.

Hard on the carpet, though.


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