As Revealed To Us By Dr. Van Van Mojo, Pagan Soldier of Eris
The Turkey Curse works. It is firmly grounded on the fact that the diametrically opposing Celestial Forces absolutely require an aneristic Symphonic setting to function and that a timely introduction of eristic vibrations will neutralize their foundation.
The Turkey Curse is a ritual taught only to Soldiers of Eris and random mundanes, and cannot be performed by Celestials, Saints, Undead, Soldiers, Goldfish, or Short-Handled Mops. It requires no Essence to utilize and gives no special status amongst other Erisians, or the rest of the world.
The instructions given below must be partaken of by the player as well as the character itself - with the exception of throwing dice (which the character does not do). If this does not make any sense to you, you are obviously a character, not a player; do not reread this paragraph.
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