in_nomine-digest Thursday, October 31 2002 Volume 01 : Number 2840 In this digest: Re: IN> Song skills Re: IN> Nomenclature and Name Change IN> [Fiction] Professional Courtesy (part 5) Re: IN> [Fiction] Professional Courtesy (various) IN> Dark Humor Productions Presents: Fate, Lies, and the Balseraphic Way Re: IN> Dark Humor Productions Presents: Fate, Lies, and the Balseraphic Way Re: IN> Dark Humor Productions Presents: Fate, Lies, and the Balseraphic Way Re: IN> Dark Humor Productions Presents: Fate, Lies, and the Balseraphic Way RE: IN> Dark Humor Productions Presents: Fate, Lies, and the Bals eraphic Way Re: IN> Dark Humor Productions Presents: Fate, Lies, and the Balseraphic Way IN> You will never look at socks the same way... RE: IN> You will never look at socks the same way... ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Wed, 30 Oct 2002 10:25:16 -0700 From: sirea@softhome.net Subject: Re: IN> Song skills Wow.This indeed adds a whole new level of complexity to Songs and their use, and this is quite a good piece of work. I say if there's a 2nd edition of the Book of Songs, this should be included as an optional rule set, or something to that effect. Consider it sto- I mean "adopted" :D --- Sirea, Free Cherub IST Destiny, Angel who Wanders, petitioner for the Word of Eternity (currently being ridden by Grapejuice, Renegade Shedite of the Game, and petitioner for the Word of Pranking Tightwads) ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 30 Oct 2002 13:15:48 -0600 From: "Prodigal" Subject: Re: IN> Nomenclature and Name Change From: "Wajenberg, Earl" > > > > Because each Balseraph lives within its own personal symphony, > > with the very concept of being a part of any other's totally > > abhorrent. Balseraphs are even more alone than the Shedim, for > > despite their despised status, the Corrupters can still share the > > mind of those they target for adjustment. > > But "-im" is just a plural ending in Hebrew, like "-s" in English. It > isn't any more or less "collective" than "-s." To me, at least, Balseraphim sounds more like a collective group, while Balseraphs sounds more like a bunch of individuals. It's a personal taste thing. ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 30 Oct 2002 16:52:36 -0500 From: Archangel Beth Subject: IN> [Fiction] Professional Courtesy (part 5) It was a long, dusty trek back to where the device suggested she should head. They'd made it even longer, driving farther away, so that Betharan would have the appropriate amount of footsoreness and grime on her. It would be rather awkward to explain the semi-arcane arsenal that they had packed away in the SUV. (She was beginning to wish she'd ordered the blessed rocket launcher after all, except that it looked like Timon's only obstacle to killing his thousand Malakim was a lack of Malakim -- time was not on the Game's side here.) It would be very awkward to explain a Djinn. So Betharan tied a bandana over her nose to keep the dust out of her nose, adjusted her leather jacket back and forth over her shoulders, and kept putting one boot in front of the other. She didn't get as tired as a human would, or hungry, or particularly thirsty -- but her feet weren't exactly happy, and it was boring. When she stood in front of the dirt-and-grass trail that presumably led to Timon's hideout, though, the cowardly thought, *Boring has its advantages, you know,* came bubbling up. She shifted her jacket back to the other shoulder, scratched an itch between her shoulderblade, and started out. *At least this should count as honorable,* she considered glumly, *since I'm doing my job despite my better judgment.* The track led farther into the partly-wooded field than she'd expected, curving around. She hoped that they hadn't missed a turn somewhere else, meaning that the tracker's four-quarters directions were leading her on a miles-long goose chase. *He could even be in a car by now, bles-- dammit,* she thought, editing her curse from the demonic preference for a moment. Though if she slipped up there, she could always claim it was her demonic "former nature." She wished that Teb'd thought of something to make the attunement of Humanity useful for her. She wished that _she'd_ thought of something. But Timon -- shame on that Balseraph of Fate! -- wasn't as interested in humans as he was in celestials. She'd have been ignored or slain out of hand, more than likely. Time to get into character, though. *You're old,* she told herself. *You did this a long time ago, and you've been through many a fight since, which has done no good for your Ethereal Forces. Not to mention the state change can make it hard to remember.* Maybe scaring him off the whole idea would be good enough... Probably not, but one could hope. *You're old, you're not particularly scared of him. You think of him as a disciple. You don't want to sacrifice your vessel, because you're down to one right now and can't help this kid if you've been bounced back to the Library. And if you fail to help him, you're gonna be stuck cataloging books for a while, till you can prove you've got the smarts to be sent back to Earth. That and laughed at by the rest of the Destiny lot.* *And,* she added, stumbling over a rock hidden in the grass, *you're pretty grumpy at this blasted trek!* She picked her way along a bend and watched her footing. When she suddenly stepped into shade, she looked up. A camouflaged camping trailer, and a battered truck that looked to have hauled it there and then given up the ghost. A cleared area with a four-legged stool next to a smoldering firepit. She had time to resign herself, tug down the bandana to her neck, and start to sigh when the unseen chain lashed out and wrapped around her ankle and jerked her off her feet. She might have been able to fall more gracefully, but it wasn't worth not being underestimated, so she hit the ground with an annoyed *whoof* of air. Then there was cold metal at the back of her neck, long enough for her to know it was there before it moved away and left her with no sense of where her ethereal-formed opponent might be. But Timon's voice was there, at least. "And who might you be, miss?" he asked, his voice a unexpectedly, deceptively polite tenor. "Grace," she said, turning her head just enough to keep last autumn's leaves out of her mouth. "I'm here to help you." - --Beth (archangel@sjgames.com, arcangel@io.com) "But [eating like this] is what lions do naturally -- when we're not filing books according to the Dewey Decimal System." --Daddylion in Between the Lions (PBS) ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 30 Oct 2002 16:59:30 -0500 From: Elizabeth McCoy Subject: Re: IN> [Fiction] Professional Courtesy (various) At 7:31 PM -0700 10/29/02, sirea@softhome.net wrote: >This was great writing. I especially enjoy the internal conflict of the >Fallen Windy Lilim. Did she Fall because of geasa I'm guessing? That would be telling. O:> >I like her a bunch, and the Djinn is cool too *beth channels her inner Tebah* *Tebah grunts* > I can't wait to see what happens with Timon :D Well, more is on the way... >*Imagines red. Lots and lots of red* *big happy grin* Oh, yeah, you're understanding! == At 7:44 PM -0700 10/29/02, sirea@softhome.net wrote: >>>What, that I like him, or that A Renegade Gamer is in my skull? o.o >> >> Both. O:> > >But Balakites are -cute- ^o^ in a rip-the-meat-from-your-bones sorts way. Well, this one is. Not all are. Just the most fun ones who make people conflict in that, "But he's BAD"/"But he's CUTE" kind of way... >> *LAUGH* Well, at least as a Game-Shedite (she does have the attunement, >> right?) she doesn't _need_ to corrupt you, right? > >Well... pretty much, yeah, that was the plan :/ *laugh* Have you told her that, as a Shedite, canonically she's not supposed to be residing in a Cherub? O;> >(Shedite) [snip] >(/Shedite) *beth laughs so hard she coughs!* >> Suggest all the fun she could have as a Kyriotate of the Wind! > >She likes her Jokes too much ;-; Suggest all the fun she could have as a Windy Kyrio with the Malakite of the Wind attunement? O:> >Heh. I loved today's fic. I wish I could write more often... alas, there's >this thing called "college" that seems to be taking up all of my time. Did that to me, too. Good practice, the papers were, though... == At 12:10 AM +0800 10/31/02, Jeffery Watkins wrote: >Wow! Timon is soooo deadly. This was a very exciting read! That's saying >something considering I don't like stories where the 'good guys' are losing. >^_^ But what a way to lose! They're Malakim, they're used to getting vessels toasted. Okay, generally not when the odds are 9-to-1, but hey. O:> Michael's probably chewing out Surfer-Virtue for not calling him sooner so that he could try to recruit this guy... And thanks for the praise and Essence! - --Beth, arcangel@io.com / archangel@sjgames.com In Nomine Line Editor http://www.io.com/~arcangel/ ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 30 Oct 2002 16:59:46 -0700 From: sirea@softhome.net Subject: IN> Dark Humor Productions Presents: Fate, Lies, and the Balseraphic Way Mulling over Beth's recent story, I started to think about the, ah "unique" properties of the lovely breed of Balseraph that belongs to Fate. As such, I went over in my mind all the unique stuff they could do, and funny situations that could arise. *sets up old b&w projector from the Dark Humor department* First, we have the lovely -Balseraphseraph-, a being whose mind is like a package of hotdogs in the microwave, with the time set for "eternity". It's only a matter of time before they all blow up into a mess of nasty gooey crud. With the Sreraph mindset, I'd imagine most of them go nuclear a few days into it. *shows tape of a Balseraphseraph opening his mouth, getting a sudden quizzical look, and then promptly blowing up. Some of the Bal-gook is shown to splatter onto the face of an emotionless Kronos* After that we have a -Balrub-, lovely people who like to cuddle and protect and make you think that blue dress -doesn't- make you look fat. They can probably get by fine, but most likely get all shaky from having to be so selfless and kind... *shows tape of large Balrub in celform, half done swallowing a car that almost ran over her attuned, which appears to be a small chipmunk on the side of the road* Next is the lovely -Balfanite-, who can spew out lies faster than your best Senate politician on speed. They get by fine, aside from talkingaboutreallyweirdandtotallymadeupstuffsofastthattheirsixeyesbegintovib rate. *shows tape of wacky-looking Balseraph with his tail in his mouth, in a wheel shape, blazing around and smashing into random objects, until it hits the camera and everything gets all fuzzy* Down a bit more is the -Balohite-, who, next to your average Elohite, doesn't really seem all that different. Aside from the subjectively objective observations. And the screaming. There's lots of that. If they didn't have such god-awful deadpan faces and attitudes, they'd probably make some great bedroom play toys (Andy's opinion, not mine). *shows tape of calm faced man talking, and people running around in circles screaming behind him. One of them smashes into a wall. The Balohite, still deadpan, suddenly cracks out in insane laughter as he smashes his head against the camera over and over. It's not pretty* Now we get to the lovely -Balakite-, a popular BalChoir in the ranks of Fate, if only because half of them end up becoming bishounen, tenor-voiced death machines with a nasty tendency to watch anime like X/1999, and taking pointers. Typical advice when meeting one is to find a local Ofanite, duck tape yourself to him, and tell him to go in the direction -opposite- said Balakite. *shows tape of an ultra-cute 18 year old smothered with blood running around with a katana, dicing up some generic looking guys in black suits by the dozen. A gaggle of Lilim come dancing out and all start giggling as they paw at the proto-Malakite. The tape ends by zooming into his face, with those big soulless eyes, before he cuts the camera in two* Oh joy. The -Baliotate-, probably the worst of the bunch. These guys aren't too different from your average Kyriotate, and they tend to be quite selfless for demons (having to take care of the host and all), but many become adept masters at setting up chain reaction events that won't leave the host in a "worse situation" until the Baliotate is well onto the next host. Well, there's also the ones who act like proto-Shedim by lying through the host and making all sorts of "Days of Our Lives"-esque situations for the human to get themselves out of. And talk about multiple personality disorder! *shows tape of a man in a business suit, a turtle, a chipmunk, a little girl, and the milkman all standing in a circle and arguing with each other. What's worse is that they're all making the same movements at the same time. Things get messy when the chipmunk starts to gnaw on the girls head, and the milkman and the business man start choking each other* Now we have a -Balcurian-, which actually makes quite the nice combination, seeing as how they can read peoples histories and then rewrite them as they see fit. Probably the most stable of the BalChoirs. Which makes them incredibly boring. *shows tape of grinning Balcurian in celform, with his tail wrapped around about 10 people at once, squeezing the heck out of them. A small banner that says "My Best Buds!" is hanging over the ceiling* Not to neglect mention is the elusive and ultra-rare -Balgori-, a species that remains in better concealment than their emulated Choir, because of the Bal resonance. Sadly, this also hampers them as they lie to themselves about having heard disturbance, and eat the dissonance anyways. They tend to be the most-loved target of the Balakites. *shows tape of screaming Balgori being chased by an army of Balakites. They pounce upon him and tear him up. Some of the Bal-gook is shown to splatter onto the face of an emotionless Kronos* --- Sirea, Free Cherub IST Destiny, Angel who Wanders, petitioner for the Word of Eternity (currently being ridden by Grapejuice, Renegade Shedite of the Game, and petitioner for the Word of Pranking Tightwads) ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 30 Oct 2002 21:22:17 -0500 From: "Josh Moger" Subject: Re: IN> Dark Humor Productions Presents: Fate, Lies, and the Balseraphic Way >Mulling over Beth's recent story, I started to think about the, ah "unique" >properties of the lovely breed of Balseraph that belongs to Fate. As such, I >went over in my mind all the unique stuff they could do, and funny >situations that could arise. > >*sets up old b&w projector from the Dark Humor department* HAH HAH AH AH HA HAHA HAH AHAHA HHAAA!!! YES!! YES!!! Finally! You've done it! You showed each one of them. I had hoped that someone would. Finally! YES! These were great! He hehe... Now imagining the possibilities of getting together a group of these guys, one of each, for a regular... well, anything. Group counseling, most likely. Though they go through the Balseraphseraphs so very quickly... Josh ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 30 Oct 2002 21:53:30 -0600 From: "Prodigal" Subject: Re: IN> Dark Humor Productions Presents: Fate, Lies, and the Balseraphic Way From: "Josh Moger" > > You've done it! You showed each one of them. I had hoped that someone > would. Finally! YES! These were great! I rather enjoyed the mental image of Kronos as Buster Keaton those gave me, as well. ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 31 Oct 2002 05:31:12 -0800 (PST) From: Michael Walton Subject: Re: IN> Dark Humor Productions Presents: Fate, Lies, and the Balseraphic Way [snork] It really is dangerous to inspire you, Sirea. }:> =====

Michael Walton, #US2002023848

"There are two kinds of selfishness: the kind that says, 'I must do what will make me happy,' and the kind that says, 'You must do what will make me happy.' The first is good, the second is bad." - -- Kenton E. Sinner

__________________________________________________ Do you Yahoo!? HotJobs - Search new jobs daily now http://hotjobs.yahoo.com/ ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 31 Oct 2002 09:26:01 -0500 From: "Wajenberg, Earl" Subject: RE: IN> Dark Humor Productions Presents: Fate, Lies, and the Bals eraphic Way Sirea wrote: "Typical advice when meeting one is to find a local Ofanite, duck tape yourself to him, and tell him to go in the direction -opposite- said Balakite. " I assume duck tape adheres to celestials better than duct tape would?... Earl ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 31 Oct 2002 10:01:23 -0500 From: "Josh Moger" Subject: Re: IN> Dark Humor Productions Presents: Fate, Lies, and the Balseraphic Way >Sirea wrote: > >"Typical advice when meeting one is to find a local Ofanite, duck >tape yourself to him, and tell him to go in the direction -opposite- said >Balakite. " > >I assume duck tape adheres to celestials better than duct tape would?... > >Earl Where do you buy *your* duck tape from? Duck Tape Relic Duck Tape (made by processing three of Moe's exploding ducks per roll) is the celestial equivalent of Super Glue... well, at least the celestial equivalent that Jean and Vapula both will allow to exist (there was an actual Celestial Glue once, but even Kobal doesn't like to remember what happened with that). It contains a variant on the Corporeal Song of Unity (equal one to one level for the Relic), allowing the individual in possession of the tape roll to bond herself to any other object in the Symphony (including other beings). This will remain so even if the other object is an angel or demon that has just gone Celestial. The bond exists until the individual who originally used the tape (who, if he or she didn't actually tape themselves, could very well be anywhere) cuts it themselves. There's three uses of the tape per roll. Josh ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 31 Oct 2002 11:53:26 -0500 From: Cameron McCurry Subject: IN> You will never look at socks the same way... To further his Word, Alaemon is always willing to try new methods of surveillance to gather secrets from humans as well as his fellow Princes. He is rather successful in this pursuit; he had invented cameras as small as a human palm long before they were used on Earth. But every so often, something goes wrong with his creations. To this day, he refuses to discuss the failure of sock spies. You see, the idea behind it was rather creative. Take Forces from a Demonling or human and bind them into the Vessel of a sock. The result is a semi intelligent sock that binds itself to the wearer and records anything that Alaemon wants to know. Then while its Vessel goes through the dryer, it returns to Hell long enough to report what it has seen before being sent back to Earth. The idea was simple and brilliant. But Alaemon didn't count on one of Litheroy's Servitors uncovering this. It was a Mercurian of Revelations who discovered the unusual creation. After all, socks are not supposed to move under their own power (Even if they haven't been washed in a few days). He seized the sock before it could escape to Hell and brought it to a local Tether to Litheroy for examination. The pitiful creature was terrified beyond belief, and it told everything to the angel. The Mercurian smiled as an idea took hold. The creature itself wasn't to blame. It was simply a tool of the Prince of Secrets. It would not necessarily be right to kill it over that. But he saw no need to send it back the way it was. He called in a favor from a friend in Lightning's service and the two set to work. The sock was released with no memory of its capture and its nature...changed. Not only could it return to Hell and tell of the things it had learned, it could now breed with others of its kind as well as normal socks. They bred true, which meant that the offspring could also be used as spies and could return to Hell to report any of their findings. But without explicit instructions on what to listen for, the socks simply recorded everything they learned. As a result, Alaemon found one section of his domain buried in socks within two months. To make things worse, the damnable creatures reported on every trivial little thing that they saw. It would be a horrendous task to sort through a mountain of footwear to gain one piece of useful knowledge. To this day, being put on laundry duty is a sure sign that a demon has offended the Prince of Secrets. And humanity dismisses the idea that socks disappear from the dryer as merely amusing. ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 31 Oct 2002 12:28:54 -0500 From: "Wajenberg, Earl" Subject: RE: IN> You will never look at socks the same way... "Then while its Vessel goes through the dryer, it returns to Hell long enough to report what it has seen before being sent back to Earth." Is this why they turn up missing so often? "Not only could it return to Hell and tell of the things it had learned, it could now breed with others of its kind as well as normal socks." These are, um, Grigori socks, capable of breeding??? Earl ------------------------------ End of in_nomine-digest V1 #2840 ********************************