From owner-in_nomine-digest@lists.io.com Sat Aug 11 23:56:15 2001 Return-Path: Received: from lists.io.com (majordom@lists.io.com [199.170.88.15]) by pyramid.sjgames.com (8.9.3/8.9.3) with ESMTP id XAA25671 for ; Sat, 11 Aug 2001 23:56:15 -0500 Received: (from majordom@localhost) by lists.io.com (8.9.3/8.9.1a) id XAA14612 for in_nomine-digest-outgoing; Sat, 11 Aug 2001 23:55:59 -0500 Date: Sat, 11 Aug 2001 23:55:59 -0500 Message-Id: <200108120455.XAA14612@lists.io.com> From: owner-in_nomine-digest@lists.io.com (in_nomine-digest) To: in_nomine-digest@lists.io.com Subject: in_nomine-digest V1 #2332 Reply-To: in_nomine-l@lists.io.com Sender: owner-in_nomine-digest@lists.io.com Errors-To: owner-in_nomine-digest@lists.io.com Precedence: bulk in_nomine-digest Saturday, August 11 2001 Volume 01 : Number 2332 In this digest: IN> [Fantasy] Halflings Re: IN> Recruiting Project Re: IN> Recruiting Project Re: IN> Recruiting Project Re: IN> Recruiting Project Re: IN> Recruiting Project Re: IN> Recruiting Project IN> "Enunciate, damn you all! E-NUN-CI-ATE!" Re: IN> The Angel of Sanity IN> IN Paranoia on website (with permission, no less) ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Fri, 10 Aug 2001 19:49:49 -0700 (PDT) From: Maurice Lane Subject: IN> [Fantasy] Halflings - --- Michael Walton wrote: > > --- Maurice Lane wrote: > > Dwarves > > If this is a rough draft, your edited version will > be > downright scary. Thanks. :) Still, I'm really playing without a net, here. Yes, I _usually_ am, but this is an special case of playing without a net, here. I have no idea where this is going, and I'm wondering if I'll know until after it's done. If then. Anyway, here's the next race for everyone's perusal. Comments welcome, favorable or otherwise. Moe Halflings Halflings appear upon first glance to be a variant s u b -race of Humanity: their most notable difference is their height (their name is derived from the fact that the average Halfling is about half the size of a Human). However, they cannot interbreed with Humans (or Elves). Halflings can thrive anywhere where Humans or Elves can. It startles many beginning scholars to learn that the Halfling's primary protector and benefactor is Michael, Archangel of War. Admittedly, these days Novalis is nearly as involved in the race's development, but it still seems odd - if one is unobservant, and fails to see the fundamental toughness that lies beneath a Halfling's well-fed, prosperous frame. Characteristics, Bonuses and Flaws Halfling characters are built on 5 Forces. As a general rule, a 5-Force Halfling will have only one Corporeal Force, with a minimum Agility and Precision of 2 (before racial bonuses). Halflings also have a minimum Will and Perception of 3. Maximum number of Forces: 15. The sunny nature of Halflings (+1 Charisma) hides their ability to soak up punishment, whether physical or spiritual. All Halflings have Toughness/2, +2 to Agility, +1 to both Precision and Will and the racial skills Move Silently/1 and Throwing/1. The race tends to live to about 80: lifespans of over a century are hardly uncommon. Total points: 16. However, like many short-legged races Halflings suffer from a -1 to general move rates. Also, Halflings start play with Addiction (pipe tobacco)/3 and Merciful/1. Gluttony is also not unknown, alas. Total points: -13. Recommended skills: Ranged Weapon (bow or sling), higher Move Silently and Throwing, various Craft Skills. Total Cost: 2 Psychology Generally, the race is cheerful, peaceful and not overly given towards introspection. Halflings tend to be fairly straightforward and uncomplicated in their choice of pleasures: good food, better beer (it's a tossup about whether Halflings or Dwarves make better brewers), a pipe of tobacco and a sing-along is the Halfling definition of a fun evening. The race tends to shrug off a lot of the usual abstract worries that trouble other sentient species: while capable of recognizing potential threats, the average Halfling will not obsess over them. Oddly enough (considering their creator), most Halflings are not particularly adventurous. Give a group of Halflings six months to settle somewhere, and it will look like they've been there for centuries. Those that do feel the need to explore or adventure tend to do it while very young - then promptly go back to their old homes afterwards and become indistinguishable from the rest of their fellows, with maybe a weapon or suit of armor in the hallway to denote their 'wilder' days. The race tends to be mildly matriarchal, but Halflings are not known for elaborate social restrictions or compacts. Simple, straightforward customs suit them just fine. Halflings do not create their own nations, instead preferring to join other races' political entities as full citizens. Most other races are happy to oblige, as Halflings make good, quiet and productive neighbors. As a general rule, Halflings tend to gather together - most cities have a Smalltown quarter - - but members of other races willing to duck a lot and stand their rounds will have no problems fitting in. Rural Halflings tend to be slightly more clannish, but remain well-disposed to other species. However, don't piss them off. It takes a lot to aggravate a Halfling, but once it happens, they become extremely effective guerrillas - and their small size and innate agility allows them to infiltrate urban and rural areas with equal ease. They tend to favor a direct and personal response to oppression: more than one would-be local tyrant has posthumously discovered that castles are not optimally designed for repelling three-foot infiltrators... Ecology Halflings can live anywhere, but prefer places where one can grow an acceptable amount of food (according to the Halfling). They tend to have few (if not none) of the allergies that other species can suffer from, and can live on a diet that would cause other races to collapse from dietary deficiencies. They won't enjoy it much, mind, but they can do it. Role in the War It may seem odd that Michael would create such a seemingly-noncombatant race - and that he considers them an almost unqualified success, at that. It doesn't seem to be the Archangel of War's style, or something. Actually, it makes perfect sense, if one looks at it correctly. Michael never has any trouble with acquiring warriors - they seek him and his out, actually. He can pick and choose at his leisure. Logistics personnel, however ... do you have any idea how hard it is to get good quartermasters and sutlers? It was simply easier to create some, and have them breed true. Thus, most Halfling Soldiers are not usually combatants. Michael gives them training (and a second Corporeal Force as their sixth, if they don't already have two), but what he really wants from them is for them to keep the supply lines running. They're very good at that, being naturally incorruptible in such matters. A Halfling cook can be wheedled for an extra helping ... but not bribed or coerced into diverting supplies. They also eat - precisely and in equal measure - what their charges eat, too (those with military backgrounds can explain to the others precisely how rare this is). Of course, not all Halfling Soldiers are quartermasters: some actually go into the field. They tend to be very good, very quiet and very annoying scouts and guerrillas: they rarely head 'good' insurrections, but often advise the leaders of them. Needless to say, the other War Faction Archangels are bitterly envious that Michael has access to such paragons, and demonstrate this by raiding his organization whenever they can get away with it. Laurence is especially shameless about this - because, well, he can. Running the War has to have some benefit, no? There are also a significant amount of Halfling Soldiers among the Peace Faction, not too surprisingly: Novalis especially likes the race, but Blandine and even Jordi will recruit them. Halflings and Hell Poaching on Michael's turf should be an irresistible temptation, but most of the fighting Princes could care less. Baal thinks that Halflings are pointless (who cares if Hellsworn die of starvation, as long as the mission succeeds?) and Belial just thinks that they burn nicely. The only one that really tries to play with Halflings is Haagenti, and he would much rather use them up to make yet more and more Kobolds. Still, an Unbroken Race is an Unbroken Race: most Princes will at least occasionally attempt to corrupt Halflings, either individually or as a group. However, Hell has noted that anything that seriously discommodes Humans or Elves will usually spill over into the lives of those annoyingly-happy midgets... ===== Liber Licentiae Moeticae: http://www.stormloader.com/users/moelane/innomine.html Last updated 07/29/01(this is usually way out of date) __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Send instant messages & get email alerts with Yahoo! Messenger. http://im.yahoo.com/ ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 11 Aug 2001 00:14:49 -0500 From: "Prodigal" Subject: Re: IN> Recruiting Project From: "Maurice Lane" > > "Precisely. Anyway, get Zaddie on the line and tell > her that we'll need some of her boys and girls to go > play dot.com refugees for a while. Can't let Baal > think that he can poach on _my_ turf without paying > the proper user fees, after all..." And am I the only one who's thinking of the Bastard Operator From Hell at this point? ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 10 Aug 2001 22:21:32 -0700 (PDT) From: Maurice Lane Subject: Re: IN> Recruiting Project - --- Prodigal wrote: > And am I the only one who's thinking of the Bastard > Operator From Hell at > this point? Not any more. :) Moe ===== Liber Licentiae Moeticae: http://www.stormloader.com/users/moelane/innomine.html Last updated 07/29/01(this is usually way out of date) __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Send instant messages & get email alerts with Yahoo! Messenger. http://im.yahoo.com/ ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 11 Aug 2001 01:14:25 -0500 From: "Prodigal" Subject: Re: IN> Recruiting Project From: "Maurice Lane" > > --- Prodigal wrote: > > > And am I the only one who's thinking of the Bastard > > Operator From Hell at > > this point? > > Not any more. :) "It was the Demon of Sunspots that caused the outage, Dread Lord! I swear to you!" ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 11 Aug 2001 11:06:28 -0400 From: "Seth Questor" Subject: Re: IN> Recruiting Project >From: "Maurice Lane" > > > > --- Prodigal wrote: > > > > > And am I the only one who's thinking of the Bastard > > > Operator From Hell at > > > this point? > > > > Not any more. :) > >"It was the Demon of Sunspots that caused the outage, Dread Lord! I swear >to >you!" > "Sir, we did our best, but our vapu-tech failed us when the Angel of Gamma Rays arrived!" - ---Seth (I worked Tech Support, and was told to use the "gamma ray" reason to a customer by my boss. It's all true. All of it.) - ----------------------------------------------------------- No one who is safe is truly free. - ----------------------------------------------------------- _________________________________________________________________ Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 11 Aug 2001 20:52:47 +0100 From: "Genevieve Cogman" Subject: Re: IN> Recruiting Project I assure you, he was uppermost in my mind during the original piece of writing . . . Genevieve - -----Original Message----- From: Maurice Lane To: in_nomine-l@lists.io.com Date: 11 August 2001 06:21 Subject: Re: IN> Recruiting Project > >--- Prodigal wrote: > >> And am I the only one who's thinking of the Bastard >> Operator From Hell at >> this point? > >Not any more. :) > >Moe > ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 11 Aug 2001 13:23:34 -0700 (PDT) From: Maurice Lane Subject: Re: IN> Recruiting Project - --- Genevieve Cogman wrote: > I assure you, he was uppermost in my mind during the > original piece of > writing . . . > > Genevieve I'm sorry: I meant to imply that _I_ for one hadn't thought of the BOFH until Prodigal brought him up. Sorreee... moe ===== Liber Licentiae Moeticae: http://www.stormloader.com/users/moelane/innomine.html Last updated 07/29/01(this is usually way out of date) __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Send instant messages & get email alerts with Yahoo! Messenger. http://im.yahoo.com/ ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 11 Aug 2001 15:45:39 -0700 (PDT) From: Maurice Lane Subject: IN> "Enunciate, damn you all! E-NUN-CI-ATE!" I dunno where this guy came from, precisely, but so what else is new? :) Moe Beliar Calabite of Dark Humor Corporeal Forces: 5 Strength: 10 Agility: 10 Ethereal Forces: 3 Intelligence: 6 Precision: 6 Celestial Forces: 4 Will: 8 Perception: 8 Vessel: Annoyed looking male/5 Skills: Dodge/4, Fighting/6, Large Weapon/6 (Chainsaw), Ranged Weapon/6 (shotgun) Songs: Fire (All/3), Entropy (Corporeal/3, Ethereal/3), Might (Corporeal/2), Numinous Corpus (Acid/3, Claws/3), Shields (All/2) Attunements: Calabite of Dark Humor, Prank, Farce of Mistaken Identity, We've Secretly Replaced Discord: Angry/3 Beliar is like a clown, really: he only smiles on the outside. Inside, he cries. Admittedly, said crying is usually along the lines of "Will those God-damned talking monkeys please stop BOTHERING me?!", but it still sort of counts. You see, it's like this. Note how close Beliar's name is to a certain Prince? Well, it's even worse in Helltongue: in fact, Beliar and Belial's True Names have only one bit of difference to them. A small, easily mispronounced difference - especially when the entity doing the pronouncing is a human trying to wrap his tongue and larynx around a language not designed for either. Add to this the well-known propensity for Sorcerers towards biting off more than they can chew, and, well, now you know why the Calabite's Angry. Indeed, given the circumstances, he's actually shown a fair amount of self-control about the situation. It's not so much the fact that he gets inadvertently Summoned all the time: it's the fact that he always meets the really clumsy and/or dumb Sorcerers. The adept ones don't botch the rituals, and the smart ones know not to mess with Demon Princes. Beliar's unfortunate name has pretty much botched his chances for advancement: he's got a pretty decent Will, but they just never stop calling, and you can't block it all, and they always call at the worse moment, and so on, and so on, and so on... So, by now Beliar has gotten to the point where any Summoning of him is liable to end in - well, 'tragedy' depends on your viewpoint. He won't immediately rip a Sorcerer to shreds: Beliar isn't a fool, himself, and he knows that Kronos already has it in for Servitors of Dark Humor. No sense in aggravating the Prince of Fate by breaking his toys. However, the Calabite's motto is, "If I'm going to be Summoned instead of Belial, then you're going to damn well treat me like Belial". There will be beer. There will be a comfortable chair. There will be female eye candy, wearing a minimum of clothing. There will be a lot of genuflecting, prostrating and general kissing of Beliar's demonic posterior. There will be all of these things, brought forth with all due speed, or there will be trouble. Trouble usually manifests itself with a shotgun blast to the head of the most tiresome Sorcerer present, usually followed by more shotgun blasts and general carnage. Word's getting around. The panicky sudden inclusion of reclining chairs and ice chests to the standard Sorcerous equipment list has sufficiently amused Kobal that he lets Beliar continue on his merry way. Indeed, the Laughing Prince is pleased with the unexpected consequences that arose from him giving Beliar his True Name in the first place: it was just supposed to annoy Belial. It's always nice when a Prank on one Prince slops over into the life of another, especially when the other is Kronos... ===== Liber Licentiae Moeticae: http://www.stormloader.com/users/moelane/innomine.html Last updated 07/29/01(this is usually way out of date) __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Send instant messages & get email alerts with Yahoo! Messenger. http://im.yahoo.com/ ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 11 Aug 2001 23:27:07 +0000 From: "Fallen Seraph" Subject: Re: IN> The Angel of Sanity >"Noman" >Outcast Seraph of the Metatron and Blandine >The Angel of Sanity Very nice. I think Aballam might want to have "a little chat" with this guy.... not to mention Kronos, or Lucifer. (Angels of The Word are so rare, and make such ... Interesting... specimens) - -FallenSeraph "I still believe in God, but He no longer believes in me..." http://eternalcity.freeservers.com ICQ: 110193631 _________________________________________________________________ Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 11 Aug 2001 21:54:13 -0700 (PDT) From: Maurice Lane Subject: IN> IN Paranoia on website (with permission, no less) I finally got around to asking Costikyan for permission to add to the public parts of my website the IN Paranoia stuff I wrote up a while back. He said I could, so I did. Updated a little while I was there, too: that won't be a habit, I'm afraid. Once a month seems optimal. :) Moe ===== Liber Licentiae Moeticae: http://www.stormloader.com/users/moelane/innomine.html Last updated 07/29/01(this is usually way out of date) __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Send instant messages & get email alerts with Yahoo! Messenger. http://im.yahoo.com/ ------------------------------ End of in_nomine-digest V1 #2332 ******************************** The material here is (C) 2001 Steve Jackson Games, Incorporated. All rights reserved.