Jon, Demon Prince of Exploding Animals

By Kanako Otaku

**Flaming
Feather**

The world is full of li'l critters to blow up...

Two Words: Nuclear Trout.

Home Base: The Crater

Appearance

Hardly manifesting in the usual Shedim Celestial form, he prefers wearing a dilapudated white shirt and black shorts in human form, eith beady black eyes and a sick, frightening smile, hands stained with blood.

Dissonance

Servitors of Exploding Animals gain dissonance when they pass up an opportunity to blow up an animals, by any means.

Organization

Most of Jon's Servitors are former Servitors of Dark Humor or The Media that Kobal and Nybbas decided to get rid off. Moving along his ranks involves the simple task of blowing up as many animals as they can in as short a time as infernally possible. Anyone who wants a loose, hardly caring boss work for him. He doesn't care if you barely do anything at all, as long as you blow up or mutilate an animal weekly.

Band Attunements

Balseraphs: Using 1 Essence and their Resonance, they can make a person blow up or mutilate an animal.

Djinn: Using 1 Essence, they can make a person they are attuned to attack or blow up an animal. The Djinn is no longer attuned to that person afterwards.

Calabim: Whenever they use their Resonance to destroy an animal, they gain 1 Essence.

Habbalah (restricted): They can use their Resonance to cause a person to attack an animal.

Lilim: They gain 1 Essence whenever they use a Geas to make a person attach an explosive on an animal.

Shedite: They gain 1 Essence whenever they make their Host detonate an explosive within close proximity to an animal.

Impudite: Any Impudite who is in his service will gain 1 Essence if they Charm someone into strapping an explosive on an animal.

Servitor Attunement

Exploding Meat!!: Using 1 Essence and a touch, they can make any dish made from an animal explode.

Distinctions

Knight of Flying Fur: Holders of this distinction may use the Calabite band Resonance, at the cost of 1 Essence, to destroy any furry animal.

Captain of Meat Grenades: Using 1 Essence and a touch, they can make a piece of meat explode after a 10 second time delay.

Relations

He... somewhat respects Kobal and Nybbas, who provide him with many, many Servitors. He also is trying to get on Lilith's good side since he owes her quite a bit from his days as one of Kobal's Servitors, or would boot licker be the better term? He is a despised nemesis of Haagenti and Belial, for different reasons. As for Beleth, nobody really knows why he likes her so much.

Allied: Beleth, Lilith* (Lilith and Beleth are neutral to him)
Associated: Kobal, Nybbas
Neutral: Everybody else
Hostile:* (Belial and Haagenti are hostile to him)

Basic Rites

  • feed an animal C4.
  • cause an explosion in an area crowded with animals.

    Chance of Invocation: 3

    Invocation Modifiers:

    +1 over an exploded animal's corpse
    +2 if you have a small animal with a bomb strapped to it.
    +3 in the middle of a herd of animals where at least one has an explosive attached to it.
    -2 if there is a living animal near you.
    -3 in the middle of a herd of where no animals have an explosive attached to them.


    History

    Once, a Servitor of Kobal, due to debts, was working in a Shal-Mari restaurant owned by Lilith. Now, Haagenti loved, I repeat, LOVED to eat there. With a sudden hit of inspiration, Jon planted a small explosive in the Prince of Gluttony's t-bone steak. The little thing exploded as Haagenti bit into the steak. It was strong enough to knock one of his teeth out, destroy half the restuarant and make Kobal really happy with the guy.

    Even Lucifer snickered upon hearing what happened. At which point, the Lightbringer gave him a Word. Exploding Animals. He, of course, got his debt to Lilith, which was nearly payed up already, nearly quadruple. Lilith opened the restuarant,but Haagenti never did eat there again. Some time later, as the now Baron of Dark Humor began blasting animals away, he managed to somehow strap a small atomic detonation device to one of Jordi's animal vessels in Hiroshima near the end of the second World War. Nybbas covered it up, changing the history of it all.

    Needless to say, getting an Archangel openly and actively hunting you down makes a Demon deserving of a Princehood. So, that's how it happened, he became a Prince. Now, he needed a Principality. Seeing as he didn't want to carve one out for himself, he cooked up a very insane plan. Strapping yet another thermo-nuclear device, this time, much more powerful, to a trout and placed it in the middle of Sheol's. It blew up, creating his Principality: The Crater.

    The rest, as they say, is history.

    Personality and Outlook

    Jon's personality is very single-minded: blow up animals. He is afraid of getting Lilith angry, little realizing that she probably won't send him into a suicidal mission even if he does. He doesn't care that two Princes, Haagenti and Belial, are very open enemies of his. He doesn't care that most, if not all, of his Servitors on Earth are permanently open-season for Jordi and his Servitors. He doesn't care if Hell wins, as long as he blows up a lot of animals along the way.

    Role in the War

    He has no actual, definite role in the War. He and all his Servitors are obsessed with one thing: destroying animals. To Kobal though, his role is simple: make him laugh.

    What the others think, and vice-versa

    Andrealphus: Exploding cows aren't sexy... (Animals were meant to be blown up, not used as toys.)

    Asmodeus: Useless. Utterly useless. (Games bore me unless there are exploding little bunnies...)

    Baal: Exploding animals have... some tactical uses. Not that I condone his antics, mind you. (Wars. Lots of animal corpses to blow up.)

    Beleth: He's an odd one. Still, I have seen some humans have Nightmares of being attacked by exploding sparrows. Maybe he caused that. (She scares me. I like scary women.)

    Belial: THAT MISERABLE BASTARD BLEW UP PART OF SHEOL!! MY PRINCIPALITY!! NOBODY BLOWS UP SHEOL BUT ME!! (Wonder why he's so angry at me for?)

    Haagenti: I'll get him for knocking one of my teeth out!! (Yet another Prince that hates me for no reason... odd.)

    Kobal: I have to admit, he is just too funny for words!! (I owe a lot of my Servitors to my old boss.)

    Kronos: He drives animals to a very... unusual Fate. (The Fate of all animals is to BLOW UP!!! As for humans, I don't care 'bout them.)

    Lilith: Well, at least he tries to stay on my good side. Just as long as he doesn't blow up one of my businesses again. (Lilith? I... uhm... no comment!!)

    Malphas: He's certainly a strange one. I don't really know where he stands. (I'm not particularly fond of him since exploded animals don't have Factions.)

    Nybbas: Exploding animals aren't really mass marketable. (Why won't he televise it when I blow up an entire herd of cows? Why?!)

    Saminga: He kills animals. I like him. (He looks like the corpse of a silver back gorilla I blew up once.)

    Valefor: He's... not exactly... well... wait here while I go steal a dictionary. I can't find the right word... (Oh well. He can steal animals for me to strap bombs to, if I ask him real nice, right?)

    Vapula: I would love to do a few experiments on his brain... so... strange. (He makes me new bombs. Me like him.)

    The Crater

    It's just what it's called. One big crater in the center of Sheol. He camps out in a small tent in the middle of it. The border is booby trapped with salmon mines, cow launching, trip-wire activated catapults and scattered thermo-nuclear trouts. This makes even Belial reluctant to attack him directly.

    **Flaming
Feather**

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