An Encounter with a Servitor of Ralph

by Perry M Lloyd
[ lloydpe@earlham.edu ]

[First see: Ralph, Demon Prince of Apathy]

"Who is he?"
"I don't know."
"What's he doing?"
"Nothing, I think."
"He's one of us, right?"
"A celestial, I think so... he's not breathing..."
"What? Hey, you're right. Hit him, see if he makes a sound."
"Ok"
[thawck]

"Nope."
"Look! He fell over!"
"Crap, I guess I better sit him back up, his face is in the ground."
"Yeah."
[oof]

"What the f@ck? is up with this sh!t?"
"Who do you think he serves?"
"Ummmm... well, he ain't Ofanim..."
"What's WRONG with him?"
"Beats me. Maybe Novalis."
"Why?"
"He might just be really stoned..."
"No way."
"Wau, I've seen people that stoned."
"Really?"
"Yeah, really. Up on Bong Hill. I've seen people sit for hours and not move."
"Really? No way."
"Way, man. I once saw this dude sit prefectly still for a whole day."
"Woah..."
"Yeah, I took pity on the poor bastard and sang him a song, healed his ass."
"He snapped out of it?"
"Nah, but it was worth a shot. He snapped out of it a few hours later."
"Maybe he serves Kobal."
"How do you figure?"
"Well, he might be laughing on the inside."
"At what?"
"Us."
"Oh. You wanna do get a beer or something?"
"Yeah, let's do that."
"What should with him?"
"We could take him with us, I guess."
"Okay, I'll go get my truck. Hey, maybe he serves Blandine and he's really out of it."
"Nah."
"Nah."
[silence, sound of truck in distance, rolling up on gravel]

"Cool truck, I'll put him in the back."
"Okay, watch the paint."
"What? Whatever. You want him face up or down?"
"Face up, so he can see the sky."

Meanwhile, our two celestials and their new found "friend" sit down to have a few cold ones...

 

 

**Flaming
Feather**

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