Phone Cherubim

By Beth McCoy (


Celestials love cellphones -- they're easily carried and they make keeping in contact a lot easier than the Kyrio method. (Amazing how many angels were carrying around pigeons or rats before cellphones existed; made them a bit easy to spot.)

However, when captured, the first thing that happens is that the enemy strips one of one's cellphones! (And guns, but those are more replacable.)

Some celestials simply find ways to reassign the phone number quickly.

Others shrug and go to their backup rolodex and enter in all the best numbers in their speed-dialer and then inform all of their contacts that they have a new number. Again.

However, for a business-oriented stronghold or Tether, this is a rather expensive proposition.

Now, you'd think that Trade would have come up with this first, but with Trade, the cellphone costs are deducted from the Servitor's salary. And besides, they hadn't come up with a good trick yet.

Judgment, however, has Just The Right Attunement For The Job.


Rookie Cherubim, to be precise, who are learning about the corporeal realm and might as well be useful as well as instructed.

They're told the phone is a subject of investigation and get attuned to seven or eight phones at a time. (This means they don't have to protect the phones. Which is good, when someone happens to try koshing a Calabite over the head with the first thing to come to hand, which happens to be the cellphone that it was holding at the time.) Should a phone be lost, they get to be on the team (often just a Soldier or minor experienced angel) to retrieve it. When a phone is stolen, they lead the hit squad. When a phone is destroyed, they lead the rescue squad. (Assuming, that is, that the angel doesn't check in from a pay phone relatively quickly.)

There is a small side effect that these Cherubim tend to attune to their own cellphones, and not necessarily as a subject of investigation, but overall, it works fairly well...

[Canon? Canon? I see no canon here...]


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